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There were great comments not only about the perceived pros or cons of dating someone who is divorced versus someone who has never been married, but also about that third category of people who are in the dating pool who are neither divorced, nor never married, but rather widowed.I love your comments, and I love the healthy dialogue that ensues, so please keep them coming!You have healed, you have the memories, and since you are back in the dating pool, clearly you are ready to move on and find love again. It’s not good, bad or indifferent; it just is.” And, just like you wouldn’t want a divorced person to talk about his or her ex all night long, so too, you shouldn’t talk about your former spouse throughout your date either.You wanted to be in charge of that decision, not have someone else make “assumptions” for you. Address it, then move on to other more interesting conversations with your date to measure how well you connect and whether that spark is there that will lead to more dates and more time spent together!Don't bog down the relationship with engagement or marriage talk. If marriage is something you really want, it's okay to bring it up, but keep it light.
It's great to have a relationship with them, but do so on their terms.“You think you know what you’re looking for until what you’re looking for finds you.” I wrote a post last week, Do You Prefer Divorced or Never Married?, and I will admit, I dropped the ball entirely and was gently reminded by many of you that there is a third option: widowed!Let them set their own boundaries and set the pace. Dating a widower over 50 is a different experience than a widower in his 30s or 40s. It's been said, widowers over 50 have baggage, but they also have so much to give.Maybe they will want their kids to call you grandma, maybe they won't want you to meet their kids at all. He has grown into the man he is today with a woman who was his wife, and he may or may not want to marry again. Be the woman he met and wanted to get to know, give his family space and let them come to you, don't start throwing around marriage talk, let him love her and you, and have fun.